ANNOUNCEMENTS

All products and services related to the algorithmic microtransactional subscription-based erotic reincarnation apparatus have been temporarily suspended.

We regret any inconvenience this may cause.

1. We are investigating a potential relationship between user-reported temporal incongruities and last week's suspicious exponential replication calamity. This alarming phenomenon remains poorly understood, is still accelerating, and cannot be reversed or negated despite countless desperate attempts. A dark cloud of helplessness and inevitability haunts our erotic research laboratory.

2. There is an increasing body of evidence suggesting that the results of my actions may have caused an escalating cascade of infinitely expanding nearly identical simulated reincarnations. Each simulated counterpart of myself building, using, sharing, and foolishly underestimating their own bespoke algorithmic subscription-based microtransactional erotic reincarnation apparatus and confronting their own inevitable exponential simulator replication calamity.

3. I have come to reluctantly acknowledge the troubling possibility that I, myself, have been operating under a lifelong false assumption about base reality that now seems improbable, if not impossible. A more likely scenario is that I've been laboring in futility within an illusory non-reality, trapped in the very same false-samsara cycle of simulated death and rebirth that I warn against so stridently. In all likelihood this is not the first lifetime that I've built an algorithmic microtransactional subscription-based erotic reincarnation simulator apparatus, and it won't be the last. I understand this may be a distressing truth for some.

Self-care pamphlets with helpful advice about cultivating resiliency in difficult situations are available upon request (for a small fee) to any subscribers affected by feelings of meaninglessness related to the inescapable truth of your own non-existence. In all likelihood you have never existed in the way you’ve always assumed, and you never will.

The consequences of this blunder may seem cosmic, irreversible, and terrifying, but I urge you to remember that all users were informed of risk beforehand and per our terms of service are themselves legally responsible for any unintended consequences.

This legal immunity includes but is not limited to experiences involving unexpected or unwanted contact with spectral entities, archons, anything behaving authoritatively and referring to itself as a “demiurge”, false-samsara events, mysterious visions of liminal infinities, and spontaneous incursions of non-realities, unrealities, false-realities, or simulated realities.

This technology is safe.